Before and After

When a traumatic event or change happens in our lives we tend to view our life path as ‘before’ and ‘after’ that event.  Our time is measured by the space up to the trauma and how we live after the trauma.

For a lot of people, the before and after defines who they are.  In a grief journey it is critical to our successful path that we reconcile who we now want ourselves to be, after the change.  We literally, if not consciously, have to rebuild the definition of who we are.  I was a wife.  I am now a widow.  I was a daughter.  I’m now an orphan. 

The journey of discovery can be brief or long.  It’s often dizzying and painful.  Ultimately though, it can be rewarding and strengthening.  But the real beauty in the journey can be found in the small space between the ‘before’ and ‘after’.  Here is the sweet spot of discovery.  Most importantly here is the place to set your intention for the life of your choosing in the ‘after’! 

When we are mired down in the fallout from the trauma, or loss, we may struggle to find ourselves, or we may stuff down the pain and push through our days; just trying to get through it all.  This is where we must be vigilant.  We must ask for help.  We must partner with those who are able to help us reframe our experiences from pain to growth.  And most of all, we must recognize that as we transition past the darkness into the light, we have an opportunity to reflect, learn, and move intentionally in the life we want to have. 

Who do you want to be after?  Where does your heart pull you?  When is your energy at its’ peak?  When your energy is high, and you feel jazzed, loved, and light, it’s a sign that you’re on the right path for you.  When we move into a space where our true values are matched with our actions, our authentic selves align with our experiences. 

Set your intentions as early as you’re able.  Sometimes your journaling will allow you to voice your desire, even before acting on it is possible.  But take the step!  Dream Your Dream!  As coaches, we see lives transform when clients set their intention, and we’re able to partner to find the steps toward the life they truly desire.

Before was then.  The past.  The place we were.  But the after is the dream.  Take steps in the sweet space between, to ensure you’re making the changes meaningful for you.

And as always, Tell your Story!